(no subject)

[alg]

I had a really interesting experience this past weekend. I was at the Silicon Valley Romance Writers' business conference thingie, and I did a 45 minute Q&A. I was asked:

What are the things that make you cringe during a pitch session?

My answer was twofold:

1. When someone sits down and says, "I submitted something to you a few weeks ago and I want to talk about what you thought."

Jeez! There is pretty much no way that I am going to remember your submission, if I have even read it yet, which is, frankly, unlikely. I mean, that is just absurd. Not to mention that even though I personally tend to go through my submissions myself (even if/when I have someone act as "first reader" on some), lots of other editors do not.

As I have said before, more than once, we are not paid to read submissions. Assistants are paid to read an editor's submissions (at least partially, anyway) -- editors are paid to edit. Editors are paid to make their companies money. Okay, yes, it is totally more complicated than that, and I am not being fair or realistic -- but come on. It's neither fair nor realistic to expect (a) that I would have even read your submission yet, or (b) that I'd remember it.

2. When someone sits down and says, "I don't have anything to pitch to you -- I just wanted to meet you."

By doing this, that person is taking time away from someone who could be pitching to me. If you want to meet me, hook up with me at the bar like everyone else. We'll do tequila shots, I'll show you pictures of my cats, and by the end of the night (or drink), you will have one of my business cards, and an invitation to send your work to me if it's the sort of thing I acquire.

And if you don't know what I acquire, Google my name.

(To use an example that isn't me, if you buy Hilary Sares a drink, and she gives you a card, and you're not sure that what you write is what she acquires -- well, Google her name, and you will see that the first link is to a bio where it says plainly what she's acquiring. Hell, the worst that can happen is that she sends you a form reject, right?)

To sum up, in the words of jaylake: Don't be an idiot.

The interesting thing that happened to me, though, was this: people who I remembered from the panel, did exactly the above things, even after I'd said not to.

And not one person did tequila shots with me at the bar later, although I did have several delightful conversations over a vodka collins (with cherries and olives, thank you).

Comments

[mimerki.livejournal.com]

I've seen that advice elsewhere. I've always figured it was probably pretty rude. I mean, if an editor/agent asks you and you start with "Well, it's not really up your alley, but..." that's different. But if you are signing up for a pitch session, have a pitch. Even if you don't actually have a book, have a bloody pitch.

(Here we see why I could not do alg's job. Someone would say this to me and I would respond with "Then get out of that chair so someone who has something to pitch can talk to me." Probably not the first time it happened. Probably not even the second or third. But eventually? Oh yeah.)

[jordansummers1.livejournal.com]

I agree with you. It's very difficult to get a pitch appointment. I'm not condoning their behavior. I just know that I've attended several RWA sessions that gave out the 'meet with the editor, even if you don't have anything' advice. That's probably why you experience so much of it.

[burger-eater.livejournal.com]

Miss Snark has given this advice more than once. She tells people to ask questions instead of pitch their books.

Not that I'm, you know, trying to start a fight between you guys or anything.

[laast.livejournal.com]

ooooooooh I really really want to go to this one~! The line-up is pretty amazing! Depending a on a few things I really might be able to go which is so much better than drooling over their website. Are you going, Anna? I have never had a tequila shot. Well, I may have been too drunk to remember in college. I can't remember either way haha. A whiskey sour is my favorite drink.

Also, with the pitch stuff, from the other point of view... When I pitched my book to you a long long time ago.. years.. (I don't expect you to remember haha), it would have helped if I could get over the excitement of meeting an editor... and calmed down enough to focus on the book... it was fun, but if I had stopped freaking out with excitement and nerves, it might have been more fun. It is so cool meeting real live authors and editors. haha. After that... it's also good to *love* the book I think.

Leaving all doubts behind that it's a book I would actually buy at the bookstore would help, too. I don't know if it makes any sense to admit that, but.. it's true. I didn't know I was on the wrong level, and I think I have maybe moved up one, which is good. But, at that time I would have never known it. Also, listening to the feedback and really trying to *get* what the pros.. other pubed authors, editors, and other writers who have been at it longer... are saying about pitches and writing and everything.. is also good.. that whole light bulb thing is great when it actually goes off.

I hope I didn't say any of the wrong things.. I am still learning of course~! anyone correct me if I am wrong.

[julesjones]

Nghh. I think if I was one of the people who didn't get a pitch appointment, I'd be pretty pissed off.

At Writers' Weekend last year I ended up with one of the "pizza with an agent/editor" slots rather than a pitch session, which was probably of more real use to me at the time, given that I was as interested in getting advice about trying to sell m/m romance as in pitching it. But at least I *had* something to pitch, had I been lucky and got a pitch session. And I would have been most annoyed if I'd found out that someone had wasted a pitch slot with one of the editors I wanted to pitch to. For the love of God, you can and should do some checking on those agents and editors before you ever get to the conference, so you have some idea of who to annoy in the bar.

[jennlt.livejournal.com]

If see you at the bar at the RT convention, I would love to join you for a drink - but not shots. It's been too many years since I've done any shots, I fear that it would not be a pretty sight.

[aulus-poliutos.livejournal.com]

Hehe, living in Europe has a few advantages. :)

So, I have a paragraph to hook you? Niice. *grin*

But I'm not sure Tor does epic historical fiction; I haven't found any specific mention on the website, though it could go under Mainstream (I know it's often shelved under Mainstream in the US, whereas Historical Fiction is a genre in its own right in Germany). Gillian Bradshaw has some books with Tor, and she does both hist fic and historical fantasy.

[elialshadowpine]

That's always what I thought. If you don't have anything to pitch, why sign up for a pitch session? ^_-

[danh669.livejournal.com]

I'm glad I friended you; your posts are always very amusing to read! Happy Monday.

[authorm.livejournal.com]

...and then sometimes you go to cons and they sign you up for an agent or editor you didn't pick because your first choices were taken, and you're left without knowing anything about the person you're meeting. So then you scramble to try and figure it out, and hope you have something for them.

[elialshadowpine]

Gotcha... so if we're ever at the same con, catch up with you in the bar and do tequila shots. *g*

I don't quite get why people sign up for a pitch appointment if they just want to meet you. Maybe I'm just weird, but I'd be much more comfortable just chatting in a casual setting than trying to impress someone in a preappointed pitch session.

See me at RT

[(Anonymous)]

Or avoid me. I've not really drunk shots of tequila, although taking a slug out of a bottle isn't past me. I have to have had a bit to drink before then, which is why I usually stick to white wine. To avoid bottle drinking, if you follow me.

I was slightly fried on Saturday night or I would have entertained you. After all, I'm the one who told you at RWA last year what Katee Sackhoff said at the BSG panel at Comicon two years ago (about being willing to kiss a woman on the show if she could help with the casting).

*G*

Cheers,
Janet/Cricket

[dancinghorse.livejournal.com]

That would be Forge.

She said, having published a number of historical bricks, er, doorstoppers, er mainstream novels from that imprint.

[lilac-wine.livejournal.com]

Oh I'd be hot if someone took a spot I couldn't get just to tell you hi and try and show you what a special snowflake they were.

[aulus-poliutos.livejournal.com]

Ohh, lovely horses on your site.

And William the Conqueror and magic - I so needed another book on my TBR pile. *grin*

Mine don't have magic and are basically aimed at a UK/European audience* but why not try it big and submit to Tor once I've finished that dang trilogy.

(* I write in English because English books get translated into German all the time but seldom the other way round. And books that will sweep the reader all the way from the Scottish highlands to Rome should reach a broader audience than only some Germans. ;)

[dancinghorse.livejournal.com]

Hey, I'd read 'em! I love that particular combination of cultures.

The horses say Thank You, Of Course We Are Beautiful, Do You Have Carrots?

[dancinghorse.livejournal.com]

Dang, you blew your cover!

[alg.livejournal.com]

I know, I'm terrible! But I would always pick my bed (and a book) over a party. Hee.

[susanw.livejournal.com]

But I don't think Miss Snark was telling people to take a pitch appointment if they don't have a completed manuscript--just that she thinks it's better to describe your book in a few brief sentences, then ask the editor or agent questions, than to stutter nervously through a 10-minute detailed synopsis of your plot.

[lensedqso.livejournal.com]

Wow, that sounds amazing. Then again, I'll drink just about anything with peach schnapps. Love my peach schnapps.

[retrobabble.livejournal.com]

Huh. Guess I'm in the minority. I have met an agent at a pitch session with the sole intention of finding out what made him tick. I knew his agency, the authors, his awards and designations. I've worked with deebs - not in sff, but elsewhere. Nothing is going to make me go there again.

But then again, I did end up pitching, so hey... *shrug*

[(Anonymous)]

Ah, see, you should give as you wish to receive! Next time instead of an internship lunch you should take the intern out for tequila shots. I would've given up lunch for that any day. Besides, then you'd be sure we'd tell you what we really thought of the experience. :)

-Torie

[burger-eater.livejournal.com]

It appears (http://misssnark.blogspot.com/2005/11/news-flash-agents-are-human-beings.html) that I simplified her advice to the point of... well, lying. Mea cuppa.

[jaylake.livejournal.com]

The funny thing is, I think I was quoting (or at least paraphrasing) you when I said "don't be an idiot." Hee.

[alg.livejournal.com]

That just makes us a cycle of awesome, doesn't it? :)